I have a goat named Lola. She is a Saanen, which basically is a large white dairy goat.
I have had Lola since she was a very young kid. I remember happily the day she came to live with us along with another goat named Marissa. I had just had my new barn built and fence up and my first LGD (livestock guardian dog) in the pasture. The barn was spotless and the stalls prepared and the alfalfa was bright green. It was perfect.
The days passed and life was good. The little kids romped played and jumped and did all the silly things little baby goats do and that is enjoy themselves.
Then Lola began limping..It got worse and worse and worse. I had my friend, the goat lady, come out and look and help trim the hooves, etc. Later Lola even went to my friends house to try to get better. I had loved my goats so much, they were FAT. Maybe with a little weight off and constant trimming it would all work out.
For a time it seemed she improved. But it didnt work out. Years have passed and I know that I am not doing her any favors by letting her suffer through the pain she must feel everytime she tries to get up. The winters I know have been really hard on her.
So I made the appointment for the vet to come over this Thurs. I took several pictures of her last night just to make certain I am doing the right thing. I feel like a monster. I feel like who am I to say that someone dies Thursday at 5 pm.? What right do I have to do this?
I know that it needs to be done. I know that should she have been born in the wild, she would have passed by now surely by falling prey to some predator because she would not have been able to run. My friend has been very supportive to me throughout this ordeal and says that I am the one with the brain and that my animals depend on that. They depend on me to make the right decisions even tho they may be hard ones. So..the date is set...I guess the time has come.
This isnt easy and I keep trying to talk myself into believing that it is ok to let her live this way, when logically it isnt ok..I know it isnt ok...
I wish she would talk...actually I wish she would just walk.